What do you say is important to you? Now look to see where you spend your time and energy – what do your actions say is important to you? If they are the same – you are living a congruent life – what you say and what you do are in sync. If they are not the same, don’t beat yourself up over it. You may want to, however, take a good look at the differences between what you say and what you do. Determine what it would take to become congruent – do you need to adjust your thinking about what is important to you, or perhaps adjust how you spend your time so that it is more in line with what you think? Don’t listen to what others say about what should be important to you, it may be different for them, and there are no ‘shoulds.’
It takes a lot of energy to live a life that is not congruent. Getting your beliefs and actions in line with each other may actually lead to an easier life.